Choosing an ADHD coach is a very personal decision. It's less like buying a product and more like beginning a partnership. You want someone who feels safe, practical and aligned with how you want to live.
This guide will help you work out what to look for, what questions to ask and how to spot good fit, so you can choose support that will be valuable to you and in tune with your needs.
What is ADHD coaching?
ADHD coaching is practical, strengths-based support that helps you understand how your brain works, set meaningful goals and build strategies you can actually use. Coaching often focuses on day-to-day challenges like following through on tasks, building routines, dealing with overwhelm, emotional regulation, procrastination and getting on with your work or study.
Coaching is not therapy. It can sit alongside therapy, medication and other supports, but it is a different kind of help. A good coach will be clear about their scope and will encourage you to access other support when it would be more appropriate.
Start with what you want support with
You don't need to know exactly what it is you need, but it can be helpful to have an idea of what aspects of your life you want to work on. Some common reasons people seek ADHD coaching include:
Getting unstuck and moving forward in their life
Reducing overwhelm and preventing burnout
Creating routines that are realistic, flexible and sustainable
Supporting emotional regulation and dealing with stress
Navigating work, study, day-to-day tasks or big transitions
Building self-advocacy skills and asking for what you need
If you are unsure, you can start right where you're at. A coach can help you clarify what matters most and what would make the biggest difference right now.
What to look for in a coach
Relevant ADHD understanding and training
There is no single pathway that guarantees quality, so it is worth checking what sits behind someone’s title. Look for a coach who can clearly explain their ADHD-related training and coach training and what they do to keep developing their skills.
If they're a professional coach, they will be a member of a professional coaching organisation. They will also have supervision or mentoring of some kind and follow a recognised ethical framework.
A respectful, neurodiversity-affirming approach
ADHD coaching should never feel like being told off, pushed into someone else’s 'perfect system' or treated as a problem to solve. The coach should recognise ADHD as a difference rather than a disorder, work with your strengths and collaborate with you as a partner rather than an advisor.
Practical support that fits real life
ADHD brains often benefit from strategies that are simple, workable and personalised. The best coaching is often a mix of exploration, trying things out, noticing what works and adjusting without judgement.
Clear boundaries and professionalism
A good coach should be transparent about:
What coaching includes (and does not include)
Fees, session length and frequency
Cancellations and rescheduling
Confidentiality and how any notes are handled
What happens if you want to pause or end coaching
A good fit matters more than you think
Even the most skilled coach will not be the right match for every person. How well the coach fits with you can come down to communication style, personality, values, skills and how structured or flexible the coaching feels.
After an initial chat, you might ask yourself:
Did I feel listened to and respected?
Did I feel more hopeful or pressured?
Could I imagine being honest and open with this person?
Did they seem curious about my experience?
Questions to ask before you commit
You don't need to ask all of these. Just pick the ones that help you make your decision.
About their approach
How do you typically support ADHDers?
What does a session look like with you?
How do you help someone who feels overwhelmed or stuck?
About focus areas
What kinds of goals do you most often support?
Do you work with burnout, emotional regulation, work or study support, routines or self-advocacy?
About professionalism and boundaries
What professional coaching organisation are you a member of?
How do you handle confidentiality?
How do you stay within scope if something feels more like therapy than coaching?
About logistics
Do you offer online or in-person sessions?
How often do clients usually meet with you?
What is your pricing and cancellation policy?
Red flags that they might not be a good fit
These are not always dealbreakers, but they are worth paying attention to:
Promises of fast transformation or guaranteed results
An inflexible system that you are expected to follow
Language that relies on shame, blame or trying harder
Advice that crosses into areas outside of the scope of coaching
A dynamic where you feel pushed, judged or invalidated after sessions
What we offer at ADHD Wellbeing
At ADHD Wellbeing, our neurodiversity-affirming coaching work with ADHDers, AuDHDers and other neurodivergent adults, as well as parents and caregivers of neurodivergent children. Sessions are available online or in-person in Wellington.
Our style is practical, compassionate and science-backed. We focus on strategies that are personalised, realistic and supportive of your wellbeing, not forcing yourself into someone else’s version of how life 'should' work.
What coaching with us can include
Depending on what you want support with, coaching may include:
Understanding your ADHD patterns, needs and strengths
Executive function supports (e.g., planning, prioritising and time management)
Building flexible, workable routines
Emotional regulation and self-compassion practices
Overwhelm and burnout prevention strategies
Values-led goal setting
Workplace support and self-advocacy approaches
Parent coaching where relevant
If you are considering ADHD coaching, a free consult can help you find a good fit, ask questions and decide what feels right as a next step.